As we draw an end to this year, we conclude the reading of the Torah and anticipate starting anew with Parshas Bereishis. One of the final mitzvos that the Torah teaches us is the mitzvah of hakel. The Jewish People would gather on har habayis once in seven years on the year after the shmita year during the holiday of Succos.
Millions of Jewish men, women, infants, the elderly, working people, and scholars gathered together to hear the King (Melech Yisroel) recite certain brachos and read from Sefer Devarim. An incomparable display of unity invigorated the Jewish people with a sense of mission that revitalized their connection to H-shem and Torah.
The gemara in Chagiga 3a teaches that the men came to learn and the women came to hear. But why did the infants come? The Sfas Emes explains the Talmud’s question in the following manner. Generally, children make noise and disturb adults from learning and hearing the Torah reading. Therefore, since this is a most auspicious time and gathering of splendor, why did they bring small children? Would it not have been better to leave the children at home? The gemara answers, “in order to give reward to those who bring them”. In other words, it is better for parents to be disturbed a little by the presence of their children if the result will be that their children will absorb the sounds and messages of the Torah and be inspired later on in life to the service of H-shem. Therefore, from the mitzva of hakel we learn a very important lesson. Parents at times must sacrifice some of their own spiritual service and connection in order to educate their children to be faithful and G-d fearing.
If it is indeed the case that parents must compromise their spiritual growth in order to effectively educate their children to stay on the proper path, it is the same focus when parents are preoccupied with materialistic pursuits. Acquiring wealth and being involved with earthly pleasures must take a back seat in order to inspire and educate children to love H-shem and His Torah. These distractions prevent us from getting close and staying close to our children. Allowing ourselves to be very busy with material interests at the sacrifice of parenting our children is one of the biggest mistakes a parent can make. Many times we hear parents confess that while their children were growing up they did not make their children a priority in their lives. What is more precious to us then our sweet, adorable children who desperately need their parents’ love and encouragement? We must never lose sight of what is really our first and biggest concern. Our children! The fact of the matter is that deep down we all know that our children come first. It may be hard and take discipline, but we must actually make them the primary focus in our lives.
The stories are endless of how our Torah leaders built their relationship with their children. One story that comes to mind, is when someone asked the Brisker Rav z”tl how he merited to have such wonderful G-d fearing children. He responded,” you have no idea how many tears I shed every day for my children’s success”. Nobody said that parenting our children is easy but it is definitely rewarding and beneficial.
As we prepare for Rosh Hashana, we elevate ourselves to reconnect with our Creator. In addition, we need to remember that we have to work with our children to help them create a positive and healthy relationship with Hakadosh Baruch Hu. Seeking ways to help them develop a healthy self-esteem and gain confidence gives our children the ability to strengthen themselves emotionally and spiritually. If we find ourselves at a crossroads and unable to guide them appropriately, I recommend reaching out to Rebbeim and mentors for advice and learn better insights to help us guide our children. It is our crucial mission.
Clearly, we see with our own eyes how H-shem is communicating to us as the war in Eretz Yisroel ravages on. Our enemies will stop at nothing to remove us from the map. And even here in the USA, with the ever-increasing antisemitism wherever we turn, we must try to listen to the messages sent to us; to come back to Him with a deeper and stronger connection than ever before. We must try to influence our children that our loving Father in heaven is waiting for us to return and recognize Who is really the Master of the Universe Who wants what is best for us.
May these yomim noraim be a time for ourselves, our families, and klal yisroel to join Hakadosh Baruch Hu as his loving children and his holy nation. We must always remember what is happening in the world now is for klal yisroel's benefit.
I would like to take this opportunity to bless each and every one of you with much bracha and hatzlacha in all your endeavors. May you always care for and love your children and may your children always love you, their parents.
K’siva v’chasima tova.
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